The One With The Party
by NomiWanKenobi
Summary: While Ross, Chandler, Mike and Joey are away the girls decide to throw a party but a little more than fun is uncovered...
1. Chapter 1

Monica, Phoebe and Rachel are slumped on the sofa at Monica's, Rachel has a marshmallow in her mouth. She exhales and fires the marshmallow into a bowl on the coffee table.

"Ha! Would you look at that!" Rachel exclaimed. There's a pause.

"Now what?" Phoebe asked. The 3 girls stare into space. Rachel groans.

"This is so boring! Urrrrgggghhh there is nothing to do!"

"I know!" Monica sighed, "We should have a party or something. You know, as a last girls night in before Chandler comes home."

"Oh yeeaaaahhhh! We haven't done anything just us girls for ages! You remember what happened last time?" Phoebe piped up. Monica remembered it like it was yesterday.

"Didn't we set the bin on fire?"

"Yeaaaaaahhhh..." They all reminisced.

"Anyway I need to get some grocery shopping done before Joey gets back, he specifically asked for a full fridge as a welcome home gift," Rachel heaved herself out the sofa and picked her handbag up, "But yeah we should definitely have a party, I'll invite some people and see what happens"

"Hey Rach can you invite some guys too?" Phoebe asked.

"Well it's a girls night in...besides what about Mike? Your husband?"

"Well you know, while Mike's away, Phoebe will play!" Rachel looked at Phoebe and then Monica.

"Sure."


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning Rachel woke up at 4am, her stomach churning, she leapt out of bed.

"Joey! Haairrrrr!" She yelled, and then remembered her room mate's absence, "Damn it, when you need your hair holding back..." She ran into the bathroom clutching her stomach and threw up delicately into the loo. As she staggered back to her bedroom she muttered to herself.

"Shoulda stuck to Joey's takeaway list."

* * *

><p>Across the hallway Monica was already up giving her apartment another clean. As she admired her handy work she practised her hosting skills.<p>

"Well you know, I like to keep my apartment clean, a tidy home is a happy home!" As she put the cleaning equipment away in the cupboard under the sink she noticed a can knocked over at the back. _That's odd, _she thought, _I straightened everything up a week ago_ she stuck her head in the cupboard and picked the can up again, as she did so she noticed a crumpled enveloped stuffed into the corner. She pulled the crumpled mess out, straightening it as she did so. The front of the envelop read: _To Monica. _The handwriting was all too familiar for her liking.

* * *

><p>Phoebe opened the fridge and rooted around for some morning sustenance.<p>

"God, why do you eat all the food Mike? Jeez there are only two of us." Picking out half a tub of fruit salad she turned to the sofa and saw herself lying sprawled across it. She gasped.

"Am I dead? Oh my god I am, this is an out of body experience. I always thought I'd see myself making love, but well whatever this is just as good." The duplicate her began to stir on the sofa.

"Mike? Is that you? I need food!"

"Um no it's you, Phoebe!"

"Phoebe? God Mike why do you always get us mixed up? It's me, Ursula!"


	3. Chapter 3

Monica took the crumpled package and sat down on the sofa.

"Richard." She gasped. Trembling, she tore the envelope open, she reached inside and paused.

"No Monica, you chose Chandler. Stop it. Get your damn head in gear and burn the piece of crap." She carried the envelope to the stove, put the envelope in the oven and walked away into her bedroom. Five seconds later she ran across the room and yanked the oven open. Grabbing the envelope, she leapt across the room and into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her. Half an hour later she staggered out the bathroom looking dazed. She reached for the phone and dialled. The answer phone clicked straight in.

"Richard, it's me Monica...listen we're having a party tomorrow and I was wondering if you wanted to come. You know, for old times' sake...so yeah. You know what, never mind, this was a stupid, STUPID idea...it doesn't matt-"

"Monica?" Richard's voice cut in. Monica slammed the phone down.

"Crap."

* * *

><p>"Ursula? What are you doing here?"<p>

"Phoebe?" Ursula lifted her head and saw Phoebe stood with half a tub of fruit in her hand, "Okay first...put the tub down."

"Why?"

"I do not want it used as a weapon against me."

"What? Why would I?"

"JUST PUT THE DAMN FRUIT DOWN!" Ursula screeched. Phoebe dropped the fruit. "Okay good, now step away from the fruit!"

"Ursula, what's going on?"

"Uh yeah, oh wait, is this not my apartment? Oh god, you know what this is just a terrible, I'm just gonna leave." Ursula stood and started picking up her handbag.

"No wait a second, you mentioned Mike, and you remembered his name."

"I did? Oh pssh, fluke. So uh yeah, bye." Phoebe picked up the tub of fruit.

"STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE, OR I WILL POUR THIS JUICE ON YOUR HAIR!" Ursula froze, "Please, just tell me what's going on."

"Mike and me, we're having an affair."

* * *

><p>Rachel dropped the towel and started putting her bra on, she struggled before eventually getting the clasp together.<p>

"Huh. I only bought this last week, and it fit. Cut down on the cheese cakes I guess. Damn cheese cakes. I could eat one of those right now. Hah! You'd almost think I was craving them!" Rachel froze, "Oh my god." She slowly bent down to her drawers and pulled out a pregnancy test.


End file.
